Comment from Diana
, looking round the table. "Could it be bcsauee it reminds us that we are alive, of our mortality, of our individual souls -which after all, we are too afraid to surrender but yet make us feel more miserable than any other thing? But isn't it also pain that often makes us most aware of self? It is a terrible thing to learn as a child that one is being separate from all the world, that no one and no thing hurts along with one's burned tongues and skinned knees, that one's aches and pains are all one's own. Even more terrible, as we grow older, to learn that no person, no matter how beloved, can ever trully understand us. Our own selves make us most unhappy, and that's why we're so anxious to lose them. don't you think? Remember the Erinyes? How did they drive people mad? They turned up the volume of the inner monologue, magnified qualities already present to great excess, made people so much themselves that they couldn't stand it.""Which is by far the most mysterious" said Julian "We have been accustomed to thinking of religious ecstasy as a thing found only in primitive societies, though it frequentlya0occurs in the most cultivated peoples. The Greeks, you know, really weren't very different from us. Theya0were a formal people, extremely civilized, rather repressed. And yet they were frequently swept away en masse by the wildest enthusiasms -dancing, frenzies, slaughter, visions- which for us, I suppose, would seem clinical madness, irreversible. Yet the Greeks -some of them, anyway- could go in and out of it as they pleased. We cannot dismiss these accounts entirely as myth. They are quite well documented, though ancient commentators were as mystyfied by them as we are. Some say they were the results of prayer and fasting, others that they were brought about by drink. Certainly the group nature of the hysteria had something to do with it as well. Even so, it is hard to account for the extremism of the phenomenon. The revelers were apparently hurled back into a non-rational, pre-intellectual state, where the prsonality was repalced by something different - and by "different" I mean something to all appearances non mortal. Inhuman."I thought of the Bacchae, a play whose violence and savagery made me uneasy, as did the sadism of its bloodthirsty god. Compared to the other tragedies, which were recognizable principles of justice no matter how harsh, it was a triumph of barbarism overa0reason: dark, chaotic, inexplicable.a0a0a0 "We don't like to admit it" said Julian "but the ideaa0of losing control is one that fascinates controlled people such as ourselves more than almost anything. All trully civilized people -the ancientsa0no less than us- have civilized themselves through the willful repression of the old, animal self. Are we, in this room, really very different from the Greeks or the Romans? Obsessed with duty, piety, loyalty, sacrifice? All those things which are to modern taste so chillng?And what could be more terrifyinga0and beautiful, to souls like the Greeks or our own, than to lose control completely? To throw off the chains of being for an instant, to shatter the accident of our mortal selves? Euripides speaks of the Maenads:a0head thrown back, throat to the stars, mpre like deer than human being.a0 To be absolutely free! One is quite capable, of course, of working out these destructive passions in more vulgar and less efficient ways. But how glorious to release them in a single burst! To sing, to scream, to dance barefoot in the woods in the dead of night, with no more awareness of mortality than an animal! These are powerful mysteries. The bellowing of bulls. Springs of honey bubbling from the ground. If we are strong enough in our souls we can rip away the vail and look that naked,a0terrible bauty right in the face; let God consume us, devour us, unstring our bones. Then spit us out reborn. And that, to me, is the terrible seduction of Dionysiac ritual. Hard for us to imagine. That fire of pure being".
to top ^Comment from Rodz
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to top ^Comment from AB
She is now married with a man in Zwickau, Saxony in old DDR East Germany. The blacklisting can be retired - my present wife found her at the Russian equivalent to Facebook, "Odnoklassiki". We sent her a small warning: "Love him for what he is, not for what he has got!"
to top ^Comment from Asgaut Bakke
She has renewed her Absolute profile lately:
http://212.59.22.112/asp/per.asp?kod=A5667973&pcode=142184&Login=&Info=HiDlBg
It is good to see that she is getting older and still not in the relationship she wants, and time is running for her too!
to top ^Comment from Asgaut Bakke
MeetRussianBride has deleted her. A point of honour to them.
This however is her current profile at Absolute Agency, an agency famed as a scamming den:
http://212.59.22.112/asp/per.asp?kod=A5340198&pcode=&Login=&Info=OpHcOo
to top ^Comment from Asgaut
Update: UA-date has transferred her to their blacklist.
Pursuing MeetRussianBride to make them remove her too.
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